4chan：趣闻二则（20160508）

引用元：http://www.funnyjunk.com/channel/4chan/Subway/zYTiLmL/

　　　　http://www.funnyjunk.com/channel/4chan/Anon+s+pokemon+theme+song+theory/MdoiLZq/

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4chan：趣闻二则

 

 

Anonymous 10/27/13(Sun)20:15:03 UTC-4 No.513020284 Replies: »5i3022iei »5iso;

ITT: Fastfood stories

主题：发生在快餐店的故事

>be me living at uni

我住在大学中

>go to Subway to pick up some lunch before class

在上课前去赛百味吃午餐

>down time, only 2 other people in there

不是什么高峰期，店里只有两个人

>employee hears the bell and comes out from the back

店员听到铃响后从后台走出来

>9/10 skinny blond

一个九分的苗条金发美人

>holding her phone up to her ear but not talking

将她的手机拿在耳边但是没有讲话

>l wait a bit and she gives me look

我等了一会儿后她看了我一眼

>figure she’s on hold and I’d better order

我认为她是在等电话而我最好现在就点餐

>“Ya, I’ll have a 6-inch BLT on Italian and-”

“好的，我想要一个6吋的意大利风味培根生菜番茄三明治还有……”

>cunt cuts me off

这个女人打断了我

>“Cant you see I’m on the fucking phone?!”

“你特喵的看不见老娘在打电话？”

>mfw

我一脸蒙逼，就好像图中显示的那样

>wait for 2 minutes, 3 more people get in line behind me

等了两分钟，有三个人在我后面排队

>finally she finishes listening to her phone

最终她听完了她的电话

>“Alright, the hell do you want?”

“好吧，你想吃些什么玩意？”

>her mistake was bitching at me, a former Subway employee

她的错误在于，不应该同我，一个前赛百味服务员逼逼

>time to fuck up her day

是时候毁了她的一天了

>order a footlong double-meat meatball sub on honey wheat bread

点了一份蜂蜜全麦面包夹双倍肉丸三明治 (这里的footlong是赛百味推出的一种三明治款式而非长度

>that bread tears easier than any other and meatball subs are impossible to close correctly with a regular amount of meatballs

这种面包比其他任何面包都容易碎裂，而且即使是正常分量的肉丸都不可能被这种面包正确地夹紧

>make her microwave that shit for 2 minutes

让她用微波炉帮我热两分钟

>she tries to use napkins to take it out so she’s not burned

她想用纸巾来将拿它拿出微波炉防止被烫到

>fails miserably

很不幸，她失败了

>order all the vegies

点了所有的蔬菜

>she tries to place a tiny bit of each kind on it

她想每样只夹一点点

>make her double everything

让她把夹得蔬菜量翻倍

>guy behind me laughing his ass off

我身后那哥们儿笑翻了

>bread is stretched completely open and tearing

面包被拉伸到完全打开与撕裂

>time to destroy this sandwich for sure

是时候完全摧毁这个三明治了

>ask for oil, say tell her I’ll say when she’s used enough

我让她放油，说我说够了她才可以停

>wait for her to stop on her own

等她自己停下来

>make her double that

让她倒入加倍的量

>oil bottle is basically empty

油瓶几乎都空掉了

>added an assortment of other sauces

另外加入一份酱汁

>just picked the ones that would dye her uniform the best colors

我挑选的酱料可以将她的制服染成最棒的颜色(抖S你够了

>sandwich is 40% sauces

酱汁就占了三明治的四成(魔鬼啊，你是魔鬼啊

>she calls me an asshole and attempts to close the damn thing

她边骂我是混蛋边打算合上这摊鬼东西

>sandwich immediatly spews all of it’s contents all over her uniform, $200 jeans, and $500 shoes

三明治立马将里面的材料都射了出来，在她的制服，200美元的牛仔裤还有500美元的鞋子上喷得到处都是

>she starts crying

她哭了起来

>lean over the counter

将身体蜷缩在柜台上

>“I’ve changed my mind, I’d like a 6-inch BLT on Italian”

“我改变主意了，我想要一个6吋的意大利风味培根生菜番茄三明治。”

 

 

Anonymous 05/25/14(Sun)20 05:03 No 19358311► >>19365568

>>19357799 iQP)

Old Themes

过去的主题

>l wanna be the very best

我想成为最强

>l’m gonna be the greatest master of them all

我会成为最厉害的精灵训练师

>l was born to be a winner

我是天生的赢家

>l’m on my way to victory

我正在通往胜利的道路上

>l’m unbeatable

我不可战胜

 

New Themes

新的主题

>lt’s a battle win or lose, it’s the friends you make, it’s the road you choose

无论比赛是输是赢，你结识了伙伴，这是你自己选择的道路

>lf you follow your heart, you can’t be wrong

如果你追随本心那么你不会误入歧途

>lt’s about reaching for the sky, having the courage, and being willing to try.

如果你想上天，鼓起勇气，勇于尝试

>lt’s not about win or lose, it’s the path you choose

这并非关乎于胜利，而是关于你选择的道路

 

It’s almost like Ash is coping with the fact that he’s a failure.

这好像智爷已经明白他是个loser这个事实。

(的确啊，现在的pokemon越来越不中二了，都在讲道理

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